impatience, irreverence, and indestructibility?

I've been hoping, grinding, grumping, and whining for conductive education out here in the dampness since 2000. I've gone through many phases: nominal success, outright enthusiasm, serious hopefulness, abject despair, "back burnering", and tonnes of looking into the heavens as professionals roll their eyes and smile as they look through me. The only thing that has kept me going is meeting a handful of parents who, like me, have been encouraged by the few things they learn and continue to do only because of conductive education.
I'm at the place today where, despite myself and a thousands reasons to give it up, conductive education is still the only thing I can say is eminently useful for my son and me. It kind of pisses me off, that this one thing, this ONE THING is the only thing that seems impossible to get started out here. Maybe it's because I'm just a dorky Dad who has no time, and no expertise to do it myself. Maybe it's because the system is all locked up and resistant. Lord, some days I feel just rotten about it all. I ask myself, "Why bother?" Then I go to my boy, my gorgeous Bambo boy; and he grins and I ask him to stand up. I help him lean forward, and he's on his feet with that look on his face like he's going somewhere whether I'm ready or not. I see him happy to be stepping, looking over his shoulder as he stands at his wall ladder making sure that I'm looking; making sure that I see what we've gotten him into. . .and I know there's some sort of current under it all that seems to move this barge along.
It's not my boat. I just tried to bring one here. Heck, I've even had a school-board tell me they want to get it going in their system. So, I stumble and flop and wait by the muddy shore; trying to shove the barge into the water.
My little blog here is somewhat of a dream. There is no conductive education in B.C. beyond the private hours in the homes of families who can pay for the precious time. I'm quietly terrified that some well-organized body will come along and begin selling it like some magical answer at a great price, at ridiculous hours, in a proprietary platform made of bullshards.
I'm just a Dad at the bottom of it all. I have been privileged to have the support of the Purpose Society to arrange 11 CE sessions in the last 10 years. Granted, that's not much, but for a program that has no budget, a volunteer director, and no source of funding; it's not shabby. But who in the heck is satisfied with that? Ask the parents I know who are really pumped and impressed with what they have learned with their kids. It's only a taste. We need the steak. It's time for the potatoes, and I'll be damned if someone is going to turn it into some fancy gourmet dish. Just had to say that, I did.